I don't update my blog very often. But i'll try to, haha. I'm very obsessive, I get sick easily, and I love to draw, sing, and sleep.
my hobbies include playing games (twewy, kingdom hearts & final fantasy!), drawing, cosplaying, and other random things like papercrafts and eating ice cream.
I'm obsessed with wicked, and would love to be on broadway some day.

Lea Michele = / = Idina Menzel.
She cannot and will not be able to play such a role as Elphaba. If she gets cast in the movie, I will cry and scream and melt like the melting of the Wicked Witch of the West in the Wizard of Oz.

Her voice is too pure. It doesn't have raw emotion or the edge that Elphaba needs. .-.

THE GLEE VERSION OF DEFYING GRAVITY < THE WICKED VERSION OF DEFYING GRAVITY.

ugh.
I love Lea Michele, BUT SERIOUSLY. PEOPLE. SHE WOULD MAKE A CRAP ELPHABA. ;__;

Labels: ranting, wicked

OH AND EDIT:
To those of you who thought I was really into it when I was singing for rec assembly- better to do something wholeheartedly than doing it without heart- you don't learn and achieve anything if you don't give it your all. (:


SINCE MY DEAR EDEN OLIVIA SEYCHELLES COMPLAINED, i'll be changing the song of the day.

My situation so far.
( Well if that's love, it comes at much to high a cost-
I'd sooner buy defying gravity,
kiss me goodbye- I'm defying gravity, and you can't pull me down! )
i'm sorely tempted to put eden espinosa- defying gravity instead of idina menzel- defying gravity, cause eden's voice is the one I picture when it plays in my head. Her's, or Jemma's.

Labels: lyrics, rambling, wicked

Oh my lurline, thankyou all for your kind words. It means a lot to me, it really does. I'm so thankful- thankyou so much. -laughs-
I feel so much better now.

I don't sound thankful, but really, I am. A shoutout to kerisette, sumii, kylie and eden seychelles for cheering me up.

My voice doesn't though, my throat hurts.

(When all you wanted was to be wanted
Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now
Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday
But I realized some bigger dreams of mine.)
taylor swift- fifteen /shot

( 'Cause it makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter . )

My life right now.
Yup, that's it.

A shoutout and a huge thankyou to those lovely people who commented in the cbox. <3 ON ANOTHER NOTE, I DOWNLOADED THE EDGEWORTH GAME TODAY.
oh and doesn't jemma look gorgeous?

Labels: edgeworth, jemma rix, lyrics, rambling, wicked

oh my gosh.

I'm not so over confident anymore. -la emoticon here nao plz.-
I remember when I realised I sounded liek crap and then went all emo cause I fail liek that.
BUT NOW, I JUST WANT TO GET BETTER.

I think thats a good thing. <3

ANYWAYS. YEAH. HOW IS EVERYONE? Please please please leave a message in the cbox pleaaase.

Labels: musing

I feel so freaking alone.

Unwanted. Ugh. I feel so ignored all the time.
I guess that's what happens when you have a huge group of friends. There's no you, theres no individualism. Maybe thats why I dated in the first place. To gain acceptance.
It's generally why I befriended, well, shy, outspoken people. I think I helped them. I've revelled in being able for them to gain confidence and for me to experience change in a person.

Now, they practically ignore me.


Maybe that is the gift?

Right, I'm not going to pretend anymore. No more ploys to grab attention.
I've done everything + 1 for my friends, and I don't know, it would be nice to get a little recognition for once. Something to show appreciation. Eh, whatever. Don't run off to shower me with gifts and compliments now- It doesn't matter much now i've said it. But yeah.

I give up. I'l just be who I want to be.

To anyone reading this, if you ever need help, or me in general, -waves- i'll be still here. Just a lot less lively and obnoxious as I used to be.

I'm going to try making new friends, maybe. Maybe they'll care. Not saying my current group of friends dont care, it's just... eh, I don't know.

Labels: musing

Today I found out that my blog, out of Edi, Kylie, and whoever knows else's blogs, is not blocked by school servers. I feel kind of speshul now.

On a second note, it feels weird without Alex. :l
sdfsdfsdfsdf.

On a third note, I really want to read fanfiction. Yes, I fail. There's nothing you can do about it 8D.

Labels: musing, rambling

Labels: birthday, nessarose, wicked

If I ever have children, if shes a girl, i'll name her Eden. And if hes a guy, i'll name him Fiyero. Isn't Fiyero the most beautiful boys name you've ever heard, seriously? :L -shot-

SORRY THAT WAS KIND OF RANDOM.

Labels: musing, wicked

I think i'm finally willing to let go.

I'm sorry for being cold these past months.
And I forgive you.


Now that's done, I think I can smile now.
Well, at least until monday. ;___;

Labels: musing

I think i'm still in that period of shock. It's like- what, alex is leaving!? It feels so surreal; I don't know. the realisation will kick in sometime soon.

Secondly, I need to get this off my chest. Why do people insist that guys and girls cannot be friends? Why is that, that a group of friends can't exist without some sort of romantic relationship rumoured to be inside it? What does it matter anyway? True love and romantic true love should be the same thing.

It's a general stereotype, and it drives me insane. I'm practically a walking contradiction according to my father, then. Sure, i've made mistakes, but they make us who we are. I'm no longer the naive, love-struck girl I was a few months ago. I've definitely matured, and thank lurline for that. But, I think i'm still a little too scared to tell my parents i'm seriously considering taking up musical theatre as my major. I don't think i'd prefer it any other way. I want to make it to broadway, contrary to many people think.

I'm asian. I go to the second best school in the state academic-wise, and yet i'm pursuing something at the bottom of most of the school's career choices. I want to be the type of person to inspire people and take people to heart. I want to stop and listen to the people around me and take care in whatever their circumstances, I want to help and reach out to those in need because I know how I felt like when there was no one to hold my hand.

I think i'm done rambling now.

Labels: musing, rambling

(you. what did you think I would say, you can't run away, no you can't run away (you wouldn't!). I never wanted to say this, (you never wanted to stay), I put my FAITH in you, SO MUCH FAITH and then you just THREW IT AWAY. )

I was just thinking today, If I had the chance to change one thing about myself/my past, I wouldn't change a thing, because my experiences made me who I am today, and I wouldn't change that for the world.

Thankyou for bringing into that emotional crap you never meant to drag me into, and i'm thankful it's now and not four years later. Thanks to you, I know rejection and the feeling of being used. Thanks to you, I have dreams to pursue. Consider it lessons well learnt.

I don't mean this in a hateful way- but you have shaped who I am today, and i'm more than content with who I am at the moment.

Labels: musing, ranting

Now that i'm sitting here, thinking it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.

OKAY I'M DONE.
I have not suddently started being a taylor swift fan. /lies

Labels: musing, pessimism, rant, reopening wounds

Today, I felt like character evaluating some of my friends. I kind of figured it'll stop me from ranting in the near future and well, it's good for character development when I write stories too! Haha. I'm including bad traits (we all have them, some more than others...), so these will remain unnamed. If you're really desperate to know, you can ask, but it wont come out of me easily. Chances are you're probably in here, though, if you're close enough to view me as a good friend. I think one of them probably has a bias, but these should be fairly correct. At least, how I view you personally.

Note these numbers arent the same as the previous posts' numbers.

(one)
the good: organised, kind, helpful, always looking out for others.
the bad: harsh, judgemental, biased, gossipy.

(two)
the good: fun to be around, artistic, talkative, willing to listen, friendly.
the bad: self-centered, narrow minded, insensitive.

(three)
the good: talkative, artistic, concept-before-aesthetics type person, caring, willing to listen, non-judgemental, willing to help out.
the bad: obsessive, lazy, lack of self confidence, pessimistic, indesicive.

(four)
the good: thoughtful, caring, intelligent, artistic, knowledgeable, honest.
the bad: insensitive, very narrow-minded, very stubborn, arrogant, ignorant, selfish, pessimistic, moody.

(five)
the good: immensely helpful, very organised, kind, caring, concerned for others, open-minded.
the bad: pessimistic, unwilling to let go of guilt, moody, stubborn occasionally.

(six)
the good: artistic, a good listener, gives good advice, fun to talk to, friendly.
the bad: pessimistic, apathetic at times. (I CANT THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE /shot)

(seven)
the good: friendly, kind, caring, has killer good taste, artistic, awesome, funny.
the bad: sometimes a little stubborn and a bit narrow-minded.


Oh, and edit, I have made about $115 dollars. C:
Not long to go! :3 I hope everyone else will get there on time though.

Labels: boredom, character analysis

I figured I should update, because, well, I just haven't in a while.

I guess, I have a few things I want to get off my chest. These will remained unnamed. You should know who you are though, if you are one of these people and happen to be reading.

( One )
Let go. I know i'm insane and you don't want to listen to my advice, but I don't want you to look back a month later and go, "well, that was a total waste of my life." Dont. Do. It.
It'll hurt, yeah, whatever, but better now than never. He'll understand, he will. He's that type of person.

Because now, cold and sarcastic as I may be, realise that man, that was a TOTAL WASTE of my time and mental health and physical health- everything declined, including my grades. I'm stronger than I was before, thank lurline, but really, I would never do it again.

( two )
I have a grudge against you. I don't know why. I just guess i'm not willing to forgive you yet and this'll take a little time. I'm sorry, but I'm just going to be like this for a while.

( three )
I love you. Not in the romantic way, but really, I love you. Thankyou for being there for me, no matter how stupid or obsessive or flailing I am. You're probably very exasperated at me and you deserve more, i'm sorry. I hope you end up doing something you love and being very happy in later life. <3

( four )
You pretend you know me so well and that we're BFFL. Maybe that was so nine years ago, but now, you really don't know me at all.




Okay, i'm done. Besides this, other news: I'm considering going vegetarian when i'm older o: Oh, and i've started doing thirty prompts for a fanfiction. c:

Labels: dedications, fanfiction, update, vegetarian